Jinx!

I should know by now not to ever brag about a good night's sleep or baby taking a 3 hour nap. Doing that almost always conjures up an inevitable jinx. No sooner than I posted on Facebook about my child sleeping 13 hours in one night, did my little angel decide to flip the script on me.

 She's down to one nap in the afternoon, and I've come to terms with that. As long as she sleeps well at night, I'm not too concerned. At daycare they tell me she needs to be rocked to sleep for naps. I guess the other kids put themselves to sleep, but I already knew my child wouldn't do that. She doesn't do it at home. I still have to nurse her to sleep for naps and at bedtime. I'm fine with that, but the problem is, I'm the only one who can put her to bed at night. I love that time dearly, but Momma needs a break! I talked to some other mommy friends and after hearing "Oh he/she just grabs her lovey, snuggles up and falls asleep in his/her crib within minutes" so many times, I decided I needed a plan.  I have the next two weeks off from work for Christmas vacation, so I decided to try putting her down for a nap without nursing her. That's right. I gave myself a homework assignment.

Day 1:
I only nursed her first thing in the morning and did bottles during the day (along with meals). Right around noon, baby girl started showing signs of sleepiness. Now's my chance! I gave her a bottle, rocked her for a few minutes, then put her in her crib and rubbed her back. Just like the other moms said they do.  She was pissed. She sat straight up, looked at me like "what the fuck, mom?" and screamed her little head off. But I stayed strong and kept telling her she's ok, rubbed her back and
then left the room. I kept her door open so she could see me do laundry and every few minutes I went to her and rubbed her back without saying a word. Just like the other moms said. She grew even more angry and her cries turned into blood curdling screams. Three hours of that went by (ok, maybe it was more like 10 minutes) and I couldn't take it anymore. I am not ok with seeing my baby in that much discomfort or pain or anger, whatever she was feeling, so I picked her up. She immediately snuggled in my shoulder and fell fast asleep.  Two minutes later I was able to lay her down in her crib and she slept for an hour and a half! I win! I did it without nursing her! Gold star for me!

Well... I had that gold star ripped from my lapel later that evening. Baby girl holds a mean grudge. As I nursed her to bed, she decided that was a good time to demonstrate the use of her new bottom teeth. I ignored it the first time. Maybe it was an accident. Then she bit me again. Still, I tried not to draw too much attention to it, but holy fuck! That hurts! After the third time I put a stop to it. I covered up and tried not to make a fuss. I didn't want her to think it was a game because that game sucks and I do not wanna play. Thankfully she got tired and surrendered to the boob when she realized it wasn't a good idea to bite the hand (boob) that feeds her. Ok now we're even.

She was asleep at 8:00. Movie time! Not so fast... She woke up screaming ten minutes later and was awake until 11:00pm. She refused to nurse, would not let me rock her in the rocking chair, wanted me to hold her, but at the same time tried pushing away from me. She wanted daddy... No, mommy... No daddy... And we did this dance for hours. She finally fell asleep in my arms while I paced from room to room, in and out, back and forth, in circles, and figure eights.

This morning she wouldn't nurse, only took a bottle. Is she mad at me? Cutting another tooth? Does she have an ear infection? Sore throat? Or has she just decided she's too old for the boob? I don't know, but whatever the reason, it makes me a little sad. The only thing I know for sure is Momma needs some coffee right now.