This past week was a tough one for me. Monday and Tuesday were marked on my calendar, taunting me for weeks, causing my heart to break a little every time I walked by. Summer work days. I know a lot of you want to reach through your computer screens right now and smack me for complaining about having to work two whole days during the summer, but actually it's four. I have to go back a few days in August. What's that? I still haven't won your sympathy? Ok, I get it. But nonetheless, I know every mother can relate to this experience. Baby girl's first full day at daycare...
Hubby and I decided, even before she was born, that we wanted our child to go to daycare when I go back to work. As a teacher, I know the benefits of learning how to socialize with other children, how to behave in a structured environment, how to share toys (and attention) with other children, and that it's ok to be away from mommy and daddy for a while (that last one was a lesson for me as well!). These skills foster independence and developmental growth, not to mention Kindergated readiness. Don't get me wrong, I would be a stay-at-home mom in a split second if I could, but for some reason our money tree just isn't taking root. I think it might be our sandy soil. Anyway...
In preparation for the first big day, I brought the little peanut in for a visit the Thursday prior. I stayed with her for a few hours so it wouldn't be a strange place with strange people when I dropped her off on Monday. They had her cubby all ready with her name and birthday on a cupcake picture on the wall. They had a cabinet space labeled and ready for her diapers and wipes too. This is going to be her home away from home during the school year. I could already feel the tears welling up and we had only been there for five minutes!
We went into the play area and sat down with all the toys. With so much to look at, peanut didn't know what to do with herself. Then all of a sudden, we were surrounded by babies! Two of them walked right over, and the others, not yet mobile on their feel, crawled or wiggled on their bellies to come check out the newbie. It was starting to feel a bit children of the corn-ish, but then one boy handed my little peanut a toy, and then another baby brought over a toy for her too! I just about lost it! These are going to be her bff's! I fell in love with each of them!
Her teacher came over and sat with us too. She gestured to hold my baby and she went right into her arms. Her teacher was very cuddly and loving with her and it made me feel good to know she was going to be in good hands. She convinced me to drop her off the next day too, even just for an hour or two before leaving her for a full day on Monday. So that's what I did.
I brought her back on Friday morning and only stayed for a few minutes. They had set up her pack n' play right next to my friend's son, so he can look after her. He's a big boy, one of the oldest in the room (just turned 1) so I told him to keep an eye on my girl. He gave me a serious nod in agreement. Either that or he was pooping.
It was surprisingly easy to drop her off for a few hours. I guess because I have been away from her for a bit longer than that when I get my hair done or go to the gym, it wasn't that bad. When I came to pick her up, she was asleep in one of the teacher's arms. A huge feeling of relief came over me and I literally sighed out loud. I was so happy to see her comfortable enough to take a little nap. I asked if they had trouble putting her down in her pack n' play for a nap and she said she didn't even try because she was already comfy and she just wanted to snuggle with her anyway. Music to my ears! No one can possibly love her more than me and my husband, but I think we found a place that comes pretty close! Just then, she opened her little eyes, looked at me and gave me a huge smile! First drop off was a success!
Then came the dreaded Monday. We walked in and her teachers welcomed us with big smiles. I unpacked her things and went through the list of things like when to feed her, how to know when she's sleepy, to change her if she gets too warm or too cold, and that she likes to nap on her side. They were very good at not showing their ok-lady-we-got-this-we-know-what-we're-doing face and let me go on and on. I gave my little muffin a million kisses, told her teachers to call me if she becomes unruly and starts tearing the place apart because she misses me so much (seriously, that's what I said), and I walked out before my baby could see me cry.
I got in my car, called my husband at work and cried to him the whole 10 minutes it took me to get to my school because I missed her already. "It will be ok," he said. "It was really hard for me to go back to work too." Oh yeah. He already had to go through this, when she was just 2 weeks old. "The best part is coming home and seeing her big smile when you walk in the door." I held onto that image in my mind to get me through the day. Luckily I have some of the best coworkers who are also some of the funniest and craziest people I know, who kept me both busy and entertained throughout the day and before I knew it, it was time to go get that little munchkin!
She was asleep again all snugly in her teacher's arms. They said she cried a bit, but was easily soothed and she had a great day! Once again, she slowly opened her tiny eyes, maybe because she heard my voice, and gave me a huge smile. I scooped her right up and gave her the biggest hug.
As we walked out to the car, I witnessed something beautiful. The teacher of the toddler room had the kids outside playing on the blacktop where they have bikes and ride-on toys and chalk, etc., but it had rained that morning so there was a huge puddle in the middle of the play area. The little ones seemed intrigued by this large body of water that wasn't there yesterday, but they carefully kept their distance. Then I heard the teacher say "Go ahead! Jump in!" The children looked at each other as if to say Did she just give us permission to jump in that puddle? Is this some kind of test? Then, one brave soul tapped his foot in sending a tiny splash into the air. The others softly giggled until another child jumped in with both feet making an even bigger splash. Before long, they were all jumping in the puddle, laughing and smiling and having what seemed to be the best time of their tiny little lives. Their laughter quickly filled the air and I thought to myself, Oh yeah, I think we're going to love it here!
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